


Adjusting

by torna



Category: Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, can be taken as jinakhos but doesnt have to be. its up to u
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-21
Updated: 2018-03-21
Packaged: 2019-04-06 05:02:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14049474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torna/pseuds/torna
Summary: Akhos reflects on everything after being saved by Jin.





	Adjusting

 

Patroka slept softly next to him. She was blessed to find sleep so easily, he mused. Sleep had never come easily to him, but after all that had happened recently sleep eluded Akhos even further than it used to. He tossed and turned for hours, but sleep still didn’t arrive. He told himself something that he knew was a lie: that he couldn’t sleep because he wasn’t used to his new Flesh Eater body, but he was here in a new place after having lost his whole previous life and his driver alongside it. Not to mention that the whole world seemed to hate what he had now become, and he had almost faced certain doom because of it. Akhos still wasn’t sure what they planned to do to him and his sister once they had been transported to Indol, but he could say for sure it wasn’t anything good. They were probably being sent to be executed. 

 

He realised his mind was racing, and that was probably also keeping him awake. He thought about how unbothered Patroka had seemed, how she managed to put it out of her mind so easily and drifted off. It didn’t make sense. Akhos was torn up inside, his mind was at war. She was lying in the same room as him, the same sister as always, but he had never felt so alone.  
Akhos was unsure what possessed him to do so, but he grabbed his glasses, put them on, and exited the room that they were staying in. The man who had saved them, his name was Jin, had taken them to his headquarters. He hadn’t met any of the other people living there yet, Jin hadn’t wanted to pile too much on them at once. 

 

He wandered the halls aimlessly, with no idea why. He just needed to do  _ something. _ His thoughts continued to race now. This was his new life. A life with no driver, no more home in Tantal, his old routine out of the window along with all the familiarities of his former life. A life with strangers. A life evading the rest of the world who seemed to want him dead for existing. They’d found him and his sister once, and he was sure they’d do it again. But then again, maybe death would be a release from this anguish. Maybe it would be for the best.  
Continuing to walk the halls, his mind wandered to what he could do to himself to finish it. He was unsure of what his new Flesh Eater body could withstand. A rope, a fall, a knife, would they put him out of his misery or just prolong his suffering even further. Would it be hard to rip his own core crystal out of his chest? His mind then shifted to his dear sister, how would she react? She seemed to be doing okay with everything so far, she’d probably get over his death soon enough anyway, after the initial shock of finding his body that is.

 

Everything was foggy, which was unusual, nothing should have caused his glasses to get dirty so fast. Taking them off to clean them and then putting them back in their place on his head didn’t solve the issue. Was he….  _ Crying?  _ What a fool. Maybe it was a good thing his driver wasn’t around to see him like this anymore, how far he had fallen. He used to be great, proud and strong. Now, Akhos found himself on his knees, Architect knows where. Against his own will sobs erupted from his throat, he couldn’t keep it in any longer.

 

Time was a blur, as was his vision. Tears had not only blurred his eyes, but also his glasses. However, he saw a blurry shape ahead of him. Akhos wandered how long it had been there, he hadn’t even noticed. He’d let his guard down. Looking up, the colours and shapes seemed to indicate that it was Jin. After a few moments of searching his mind for something to say, some way to excuse himself or explain what was going on, he just said what was really on his mind.

  
“You shouldn’t have saved me. There's no hope for me.”   
The blurry figure responded immediately. “I did what was right, what someone else once did for me.” Unsure of how to respond, Akhos kept quiet. There wasn’t much else to say. The blur knelt down in front of him, and what was obviously a hand came to his face. He felt the other man's thumb brush near the corner of his eye, wiping some of the tears away.   
“I just want it all to end. Everything.”    
“No. You just want the pain to end.”   
“There’s no end to it in sight. I’m all alone, and it feels like the entire world is against me.”   
Jin paused, before responding. “I understand completely, we’re in the same boat.” Another pause, before continuing. “But you’re not alone. You have your sister, and you have me now too.” After finishing this sentence, Jin pulled the smaller man into an embrace, so that Akhos had his head buried against the other man’s shoulder. “I know how you feel, but it does get better…. Somewhat. Keep going, for me, please.”  
He sobbed again. Jin continued. “I know we just met, but I’ll do anything in my power to help you get better.” Akhos continued to sob, he was sure that if he tried to speak he’d find himself unable anyway. Jin simply held him in place and rubbed his back, repeating “I’m here for you now.”   
  


 

Jin held the small man against his shoulder. He had said everything he wished, words he had once needed to hear himself. He thought about what a cruel place the world was, to have reduced this poor man to this. To have broken him so deeply. But he had already come to this conclusion about the world long ago, it was nothing new. The realisation that the sobs had died down snapped him out of his thoughts. The young Flesh Eater seemed to have tired himself out and fallen asleep. He considered carrying him back to his shared room with his sister, but upon remembering the dangerous thoughts he had displayed earlier decided it wasn’t a good idea. It would be better to keep an eye on him himself, he thought as he picked the once Blade up and carried him back to his own room. He lay Akhos next to him on his side, and held him close.  _ He could probably use the physical contact and reassurance,  _ he told himself. Jin took the other man’s glasses off of his face and set them on the bedside, making a mental note to clean them later. As he settled down for the long night of watching the other ahead, he heard a faint voice.    
“Th-thank you.” And as soon as he had said it, Akhos had drifted off back to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of a vent-y thing. Please leave a comment or kudos if you enjoyed!


End file.
